It doesn't get much better than this....

Thank you, Lord, for Ryan. He is the most amazing husband a girl could ever hope for. He loves me and shows me in the most wonderful ways each and every day. My life wouldn't be complete without him and each and every day I am so thankful for this life you've given us. I thought love like this only existed in fairy tales but you surprised me and blessed me with my very own. You've given us the gift of life and together we will raise this child with the most love and happiness a person could hope for. So, I thank you today, and every day, for these blessings I couldn't live without.

VACA!

Vacation time! Mini vacation time, that is. But nonetheless, we are so looking forward to our getaway weekend coming up! We have been non stop on the go since we moved to Arizona, it seems. Almost immediately after moving here, we both picked up full time jobs... Ryan's being a job and a half with the crazy amount of hours he works... along with putting in extra hours working on the house, starting our garden, buying a new car, finding out about Baby, and everything else, it just feels as if we haven't had much time to just relax and enjoy ourselves and each other. Well, this weekend that's exactly what we're going to do. We're getting away to a peaceful resort with beautiful pools and private cabanas and fancy restaurants in a gorgeous setting and we're going to do nothing except relax... Okay, and do a little shopping for The Hub's at Cabela's :) All I've wanted to do for the longest time is just relax by the pool, get some sun, enjoy the cool water, and spend some quality, task-free time with Ryan. IS IT FRIDAY YET!? I just absolutely can not wait for this weekend to get here! I need to make a list of supplies to buy before we head out : Sun screen, new towels, big floppy hat, maybe a new pool bag... Maybe I will go get those today... or maybe I should wait so I'm not staring at them in anticipation while the next 4 days creep by. At least mid week I have something to look forward to. My next doctors appointment to hear the babies heartbeat! Yay! That is always so exciting! I haven't been able to hear it yet, I've just watched the rhythm of it on the screen so this is an extra special appointment and I can't wait! Ahh, well Ryan is about to call on his lunch break so I'll wrap this up but be on the lookout for our vaca pictures on FB next week! Adios!

1 + 1 = 3

One plus one equals three. True or False? Most people would argue that one plus one actually equals two therefore my statement rings false. On the other-hand though, if you're talking about my current situation, my statement actually rings true. Confused? Let me put it this way. One person + another person often = a little person. And if you're still confused... my gosh! I'M PREGNANT! No simpler way of putting it than that :) I know, I can't believe it either. Pretty dang exciting, eh? We found out a little over a month ago now and the thought of having a child is definitely sinking in. The feelings of having a child are definitely sinking in as well. I'm talking about the wonderful, so called, "morning sickness" that actually occurs all day long, every day of my life. And the pure sense of exhaustion I get, also, every day of my life. Some days it's frustrating beyond belief to feel this worthless all the time. I'm literally too tired to cook dinner when I get home from work and my days off are spent trying to catch up on rest so it's safe to say that come Sunday, we have a ton of laundry to catch up on. And as frustrating as the sickness gets, the days I get to see our baby on the ultrasound or watch the rhythm of it's heartbeat make it more than worth it. There is nothing like seeing your own child developing and moving in your own body. Because I'm still very early on, I don't feel the baby inside of me (the side effects, yes!) so being able to see it on the ultrasound reassures me that all of this crappiness is so so so worth it!! My first ultrasound was at 5.5 weeks and the baby was a teeny tiny dot that decided to show up at the very last second. My second ultrasound was at 8.5 weeks and again, I was expecting to see a little dot show up, maybe just a little bigger than the last time, but wow! Our baby had grown so much in 3 weeks and it was such an exciting feeling! You could even see the umbilical cord which completely amazed me. My next US will be between 16-20 weeks when we find out the sex of the baby. I have a strange feeling that it's a little girl. I've felt that way since day one so I will be surprised if we're having a little boy. Ryan is hoping our first is a little boy, of course. He said he wants a little boy to call "Buddy" and take fishing, hunting, and camping. So cute! I will be happy with whatever God blesses us with, boy or girl, as long as he/she is healthy :) That's all I can ask for! It is still crazy for me to think that come January, Ryan and I will be welcoming our first child into our lives. We are so ready for it though. I am so thankful to have married the man I did. Not only is he the most helpful, supportive, loving man I could ever ask for, I know in my heart that he is going to be an amazing Dad and that means the world to me. I know that together we can accomplish anything and that we will both strive to give our child the most wonderful life imaginable I'm also thankful to have such a welcoming and supportive family who is also so excited for our newest addition to arrive. When we told my family, tears were a flowin' and smiles and laughter filled the air. We are so lucky to have them. Even more though, we are so lucky to have been given such an amazing gift of life; our first Baby.

Almost That Time...

I can not believe it's already June! I've been thinking a lot about this time last year and all that has happened since then. This time last year, my NC ladies and I were preparing for our Marines to come home from their deployment to Afghanistan. Although we still had a little over a month left, it was such an exciting time! I can remember perfectly the talks about what homecoming would be like, the planning on what to wear, the sign making, and just the all around joy we all felt that our men were finally coming home. As our one year anniversary of having our Marines home approaches, I'm filled with so many different emotions. The first; shock. I can't believe a year has already passed. In some ways, it feels like they just got home last week. The second; pure gratefulness that my husband was able to come home to me. Not everyone is lucky enough to say that and it breaks my heart. Third; pride that our men have the strength and courage to do the job that they do, selflessly. And although this one year anniversary is a mile marker in Ryan's journey and in our life, my heart weighs heavy this year. Approaching the one year anniversary of our men coming home, Ryan's Battalion will be preparing to leave on another tour to Afghanistan. Just one year after being home, they're sent away again. I can't describe the mixed emotions that both Ryan and I are feeling. At first I think of how thankful I am that he doesn't have to go back and immediately afterwards I think of one of my best friends who for the second time, will be delivering their new baby girl shortly after saying goodbye to her husband for the second time. I think of another friend who will be experiencing her first deployment in a completely new city clear across the country from her family. I think of the friends who just welcomed the newest addition to their family and are already forced to say goodbye to Daddy. I think of the friends that I cried with, prayed with, shared my deepest feelings with who will also be saying goodbye to their husbands again. I think about how lonely we felt, how sad and worried we felt. I remember the only thing getting me through the 6 weeks I hadn't heard from Ryan was the comfort of my friends. I think about the men who will miss their child's birth or will miss the first laugh or steps that their child takes. I think of the men who fear not making it home to their new wife. It's hard to feel thankful without feeling guilty that my husband is staying home when some of the people that I care most about are going to be experiencing one of the most difficult times in their lives without me. I mean, they know I'm a phone call away but there is something about experiencing it together that makes it different. This isn't going to make much sense... I don't wish to go through another deployment but I do wish to go through this difficult time with my friends. I want to be able to be there for them and help them like we were able to help each other last deployment. This time has also been difficult on Ryan. Although getting out of the Marines was a decision that he made, knowing that his Marines are going back without him has been hard for him to accept. He says "it's weird" knowing that he's not able to be there to help his guys out. As much as his deployments sucked, he, in a way, enjoyed them. Of course he missed being away from family and away from the comforts of his own home, but infantry was his job and he loved it. He's a natural born leader and was good at what he did. He liked being able to do his job and there is something about "being with the guys" in Afghanistan that you just don't feel anywhere else. He always says, "if they needed me, I'd go back in a heartbeat." Some people ask me how I'd feel if he went back in. Honestly, if he went back in to help his Marines out, I would be so proud. Of course I would feel scared and sad at times, but how can you not be proud of a man who cares so deeply for something like that? I would support his decision 110% if it was what he knew he wanted and needed to do. I don't really know where I'm going with this other than that my heart just breaks for these people that we love and care so much about. I know I wont personally be experiencing this deployment with these ladies, but in my heart, I am. I know what it feels like. I know how hard it is and if it means anything, I'm here and always will be. Each and every day I pray for these ladies and their Marines and will continue to pray until each of them is reunited with their loved ones. God Bless the Marines, Sailors, and families of 1st Battalion 6th Marines.